Ditch your “Don’t”
Have you ever noticed that, when you tell your children, “Don’t do this or that,” they either just keep right on doing it, or they stop doing it and start doing something that is equally not what you want?
They’re not, not wanting to do what you want.
It’s all to do with the subconscious mind and, with a few simple tweaks, everything can run much more smoothly for everyone, with very little effort.
The subconscious mind is amazing. It can do any amount of activities at once; not like the conscious mind that’s maxed out at 9 things and, more often than not is only handling 1 or 2 things at once. The subconscious mind is also rather like a 5 year old child who is really eager to please you. It will work its socks off to get you what it thinks you want. The only problem is that it is pretty useless at processing “Don’t”.
So, “Don’t run” becomes, “Run”; “Don’t push that button” becomes, “Push that button”; and “Don’t panic” becomes, “Panic!”
The other problem with such phrases as “Don’t do X” is that, even if your children register on stopping doing ‘X’, the likelihood of them doing what you want (ie ‘Y’) is very slim. If you want your children to do something, say so! Be clear about what ‘Y’ is and focus on it. Consequently, the likelihood of your children doing ‘Y’ soars.
The added bonus is that, once your children fully grasp ‘Y’, the likelihood of them doing ‘X’ naturally fades or stops altogether. It’s like when Granny explains that she wants her grandchildren to wait for their mouths to be empty before they speak. If they are silent until their mouths are empty, they can’t be talking with their mouths full.
Hearing adult-child interactions will never be the same again.
Ditching “Don’t” is a simple way for you and your children to overcome these issues that everyone has, and makes life a lot easier and enjoyable for everyone.
I wonder how many of your interactions today will benefit from the absence of “Don’t”.
To your success